The Story Of My Fucking Life


Posted by ilbebe on December 24, 2008

You know when you’re about to throw up and you get all that warm spit in yr mouth, and it feels good, but you know it’s only there because something bad is about to happen? I got that feeling a few minutes ago, but I suppressed the puke. Last night I was not so successful. I threw up several times in a garbage can in the back room of a bar. It was a great night.

“Search and Destroy” is a fucking great song. It might be the best song of all time, but lately I’ve also been into “Werewolves of London” by Warren Zevon, and obviously anyone who is trying to compare and contrast those two songs is someone whose opinion means nothing, so I won’t. I will say that I have not yet come across any music that be completely discounted. If it moves someone, anyone, one fucking person, it has merit. If it doesn’t move anyone, it probably isn’t even music. Master P, I’m looking at you, you money-laundering bitch.

I feel like I could live the rest of my life inside the opening chords of After The Gold Rush, the live version from October 1978, SF, CA. There is majesty there, and a soft place to sleep when it’s time to dream. There is a dense forest populated by creatures both adorable and terrifying, and I’m sure that no one misses a meal in the land of those chords. They make me cry, but I think we’ve established that that’s not hard to do. Let me say then that they give me a feeling.

I had a strange experience in Seattle a few months ago with a girl who gave me a fake name. She was of the opinion that we come into this world alone, and we leave it alone, and I guess on a factual level that’s accurate, but fuck the facts. Have you ever hugged someone? After the hug is over, there is a memory, and that memory will leave this body and this world with you. Hug as many people as possible, you might need a fucking ocean liner to take yr memories with you, but it will be worth it. Don’t spend the rest of yr life worrying about where yr going to scrape up the cash for that ocean liner, it will come. There will be free sodas, and live entertainment in the lounge, and you might a warm feeling in yr mouth, but it won’t be puke, it’ll be memory.

Make yr memories good.

9:52 AM 12/18/08


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